Monthly Archives: July 2012

Want to NEVER be SHY again? Here ya Go!

Want to NEVER be SHY again? Here ya Go!.

There are some people who are so shy that they just cannot function around others.   Fortunately if yu ever have had that feeling of being shy. the $500 Millionaire has figured out how to overcome being shy in a short and simple read.  The $500 Millionaire has painted a great explanation of what it means to be shy and once you read this, if you want, you can choose to never be shy again.

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Want to NEVER be SHY again? Here ya Go!

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This past weekend I took a Motorcycle ride through  Yellow Stone National Park for a charity called Smiles for Life.  On this ride I was introduced to a new concept by the $500 Millionaire. Being that I am not normally a shy person, it was always hard for me to understand why people were shy.  I have been shy on the rare occasion but I have always been able to overcome this feeling and I never realized why until now.  There are some people who are so shy that they just cannot function around others.  When they walk into a room full of people, they feel awkward and it is impossible to give a good first impression if you feel that way.  Fortunately for shy people, the $500 Millionaire has figured out how to overcome being shy in a short and simple read.  The $500 Millionaire has painted a great explanation of what it means to be shy and once you know this, if you want, you can choose to never be shy again.

First things first, you need to understand and believe that being shy is a choice, not a condition.   Being Deaf, Being Blind, Being Short, Being Tall…these are all conditions meaning you cannot do anything about it. You cannot change a condition; you just have to work around it.    Being Clumsy, Being Fat, Being Forgetful, Lacking Discipline… These are all Choices meaning you can do something about it.  Choices on the other hand, are different from conditions; you can change choices.  If you are shy you are making a choice to be shy. One great thing about choices is that they are in our power and we have the ability to change our choices.  Changing a choice like this is not easy but is extremely simple.  The only way to work with a condition is to adapt; to work with a choice, you just have to change the way you think.

Just because we can change our choices,  with no discipline, it will be impossible to change this choice  but if you never want to be shy again, you have all the tools here and will be able to control this choice after reading,

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So what is being shy?  According to my friend Webster’s, the definition of “Shy” is 1) Easily Frightened. 2) Disposed to avoid a person or thing. 3) Hesitant in Committing oneself.  It is almost like Webster’s is considering shy as a condition but It IS NOT A CONDITION.  Being shy is a mental state that can be physically paralyzing to some if they don’t FULLY understand what is going on.  If you haven’t read our post on risk and fear titled “How to Swim With Sharks and Not Get Bit” (https://500dollarmillionaire.wordpress.com/2012/07/18/how-to-swim-with-sharks-and-not-get-bit/) read it now to better understand this.  The simple answer as to why the mental state of being shy is so powerful is because when a person is in that mental state they are unsure of the outcome and fear starts to kick in.  When someone is unsure of what is going to happen, the true paralyzer is their uncertainty of their ability to handle the situation.

So now that we understand that being shy is a choice, not a condition, we understand that it is 100% controlled by the individual.  Now what is it that shy people are thinking?  According to the $500 millionaire, when someone is shy they are only shy because they are putting ALL of their attention on themselves.  That is right; being shy is one of the most SELFISH things a person can do.  To take all the attention that you should be giving to others and putting it all on yourself. Most people who are shy will tell you that they do not want to be the center of attention and they are telling you the truth.  This is why they feel SO uncomfortable when they choose to be shy and pull all of their attention on themselves.

So how do you handle it?  This is simple; you need to understand that not everyone is paying attention to you.  You are the one pulling all the attention from you, onto you. People do not notice the things you notice about yourself so stop drawing attention to them.  If you were to take that focus and attention that you are giving yourself and give that focus and attention to others, you will feel much more comfortable in any situation.  Also the people around you will like you much more.  Anytime you get attention, you can just pass it along to someone else, especially if you’re the one giving you the attention.

It is as simple as that.  I’m sure you’ve hear that great piece of advice that imagine the crowd in their underwear if you are in front of people  All that is doing is taking your focus off of you and putting it on the people around you.  That’s what you should do every time you meet someone.  Be interested in them and not interested in what you are doing.  Don’t worry about their opinion on you because if you give them attention they deserve, they will immediately like you.  .

ImageNow that we know being shy is a choice I challenge you to NEVER use this as an excuse and never use any choice as an excuse.  Personally I don’t even except conditions as excuses, rather than accept them as a hurdle that you need to get over.  Just because you are “too shy”, this should not slow you down.  Now that you have the knowledge about what is going on in your head, you are now able to control it.  The next choice you have is whether or not you are going to CHOOSE to control it.  When you feel that shy feeling coming on you need to understand that you are paying too much attention to yourself.  Stop being rude, stop being selfish, and start paying attention to other people.

The $500 Millionaire has always told me that you should meet everyone one with the understanding that they have an invisible 4 letter acronym tattooed on their forehead. “M.M.F.I”, Make Me Feel Important.  People want that attention that as a shy person, you are selfishly taking.  Be a caring person and pass that attention to others.  Always be interested, not interesting.  Give attention to others and ACCEPT attention from others.  Do not take attention from others and DO NOT GIVE IT TO YOURSELF.  The best way to not be the center of attention but be the most likable person in a group is to deflect attention to others.


How to Swim With Sharks and Not Get Bit

How to Swim With Sharks and Not Get Bit.

Did you ever wonder why somebody would VOLUNTEER to swim with sharks? I use to think that was CRAZY! When I am in the ocean, I try my best not to step on a shell let alone see a shark! There are people who make a living, taking people TO THE sharks!!! When I did a bit of research, I was not at all surprised to find out that there are more fatal shark attacks on people playing/surfing in the ocean, than from people trying to swim with the sharks. The $500 millionaire has found out how they do it.


How to Swim With Sharks and Not Get Bit

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Did you ever wonder why somebody would VOLUNTEER to swim with sharks?  I use to think that was CRAZY! When I am in the ocean, I try my best not to step on a shell let alone see a shark!  There are people who make a living, taking people TO THE sharks!!! When I did a bit of research, I was not at all surprised to find out that there are more fatal shark attacks on people playing/surfing in the ocean, than from people trying to swim with the sharks.  The $500 millionaire has found out how they do it.

To a shark, there is no difference between the people looking for the sharks and the people who are surfing with their friends.  A shark is a shark and we all know what they do…hunt.  Both humans probably taste similar but why doesn’t the sharks bite the people who are trying to swim with them as much as people just playing in the ocean?

The answer is simple and it all has to do with Risk Management.  In today’s society, there are tons of risks that make it harder and harder to become successful.   To become successful in any avenue of your life, you need to become a master of Risk Management.  In the instance with the shark bites, the $500 Millionaire believes the reason why the attacks are so one sided is because one group is prepared and aware of their environment and the other is oblivious to everything underneath them.  Have you ever been that person in any aspect of your life?

Now the $500 Millionaire does not surf and does not regularly swim with sharks but he does take risks…BIG RISKS.   To an optimist, with big risk come big rewards. To a pessimist, with big risk come even bigger problems.  Both are true but with the right preparation and understanding of your environment, you can mitigate that risk dramatically.   The $500 Millionaire has had failures throughout his life but nowhere near what he would have seen if he did not take the right precautionary measures.

Some people love risk and some people hate it.  One thing the $500 Millionaire believes is that when people are ready for it, no matter how big or small, almost anyone can handle it.  Risk is one thing that holds back someone’s ability to grow in their life, their relationship, and their carrier.  With risk comes one of the most powerful paralyzer to growth…fear. 

Think of fear as an acronym… False Evidence Appearing Real.  Fear can only exist when something is unknown.  If you know the outcome, there is no reason to fear.  (Feel Free to comment any outcome you know, that you still fear) Walking through a haunted house, you are not scared of what is happening, you are scared of what could potentially happen.  You know that you are not going to be hurt but for some reason you are still scared.  If you doubt this, walk through it again a second time, see if it there is as much fear.  Or watch a scary movie twice…not the same once you know what is going to happen.

Fear can also come from the thought that you are unable to handle a situation.  Something happens and you doubt you ability to make the correct decision.  Two words can fix that and never allow fear to hold you back again.  That is preparation and knowledge

If you are forced to work with someone you cannot trust or rely on, whether that is a Partner, a co-worker or a teammate, by knowing you can not trust or rely on them, you are able to work around their actions.  This is another one of those instances where knowledge is power and if you use that power correctly you can keep growing, take risks, and gain great rewards.  Remember Facts overtake Fear!

When you are investing your money, by just doing a bit of research and preparation, you can stay safe.  When buying a house, with just a bit of research and preparation, you can stay safe.  When finding a spouse, making a sale, or just crossing the street…with just a bit of research and preparation, you can stay safe.  With preparation and knowledge, you can gain GREAT rewards with manageable risk.

Think about some of the riskiest things people can do.  Sky Diving, Bungee Jumping, Rock Climbing, Motorcycle Racing, Extreme Sports, etc.  There are people able to make a living doing things that if the $500 Millionaire even tried, like most of us, would get seriously injured or even die.  This is not because they are any different from the $500 Millionaire.  It is because they are prepared and have the knowledge of the correct actions to take to do what they want to do. (How to take the risk)

To answer the question, “How to swim with sharks and not get bit?”  It is simple, you take the necessary steps to prepare yourself and get knowledgeable about the situation.  Find an Instructor (a Mentor), Practice before the Real Test (gain Knowledge/Correct Advice), jump in the water (Take the action).  If you were to uses this method in every decision you make, you will have a much easier life and much fewer chaotic situations.  Preparation is the key to success.

 

Remember, the best way to deal with fear is knowledge.   I am not saying every time you fear something, by gaining knowledge it becomes good.  Knowledge and preparation together is just a very powerful tool to protect you from risk.  The $500 Millionaire tells me to trust my intuition but rely on facts to make a decision.  Fear is not Fact so do not only use that to make a decision.


A Good Offense Needs Less Defense

A Good Offense Needs Less Defense.

Why let consequences decide your future?  In life, like in sports, you need a good defense but without a good offense, you will never win and never move forward. Here are just a few simple concepts that you can start using today to have a strong Offense which will allow you to make decision before a problem, rather than after the problem happens.  Why are you Not Prepared?

 


A Good Offense Needs Less Defense

ImageWhy let consequences decide your future?   Anyone who has ever played spots has heard that defense is the most important part of the game.  While we believe that defense is VERY important, we believe Offense never gets a fair shot in the glory.  In life, like in sports, you need a good defense but without a good offense, you will never win and never move forward.

Especially in today’s economy, many people are letting their Consequences, both those they can control and those they cannot control, determine their future.  When we say that, we mean living a very reactive life.  A problem happens, I try to handle it, Next problem, I try to handle is, and so on and so on.  This might work every now and then but if the problem Is too big (Loosing Job, House, Family, etc) it is impossible to manage with this mindset.  This could potentially put you in an uphill fight for the remainder of your life.  The $500 Millionaire believes if our country was to lose this Reactionary Lifestyle, we could turn this societal downfall around.  Also this reactive lifestyle will not work if you are actually trying to make the most out of life.  People tend to not take action until they have to…WOW, What a terrible way to live.

With a good offense, you need less defense, with a bad offense, you need great defense just to survive.  So that makes sense in the sporting world but what about in life, business, and relationships?  The $500 millionaire will be the first to say that this is not easy to do and it takes a good amount of conscious effort to do this.  The key word is Discipline and without that, not only will this not work, but your life will be chaotic.  If you can master this, your life will be less stressful, you relationships will be stronger, and your professional life will be more on the path of your choosing.

Here are just a few simple concepts that you can start using today to have a strong Offense which will allow you to make decision before a problem, rather than after the problem happens.  This will allow you to make the decision before the problem happens.  Here are just three real quick:

1. Money– Save this.  Keep in your mind that you do not make money to spend money; you make money to save money.  This does not mean you do not spend money on things you want, but understand why you are working and why you NEED money.  There are needs and wants, make sure the Needs are always taken care of.   I like to use the term Hood Rich and this is when people get their paycheck and spend it all.  It might mean they can buy nice things but they cannot support themselves in times of crisis.  A simple way to do this is to make sure you pay yourself first.  I know this is a strange concept but, make sure you are always giving yourself 10% of every dollar you make.  It doesn’t matter if it is $10 or $1,000,000, pay yourself first.

2.  Take care of your health– This doesn’t mean to be at the gym 5 days a week, you don’t even have to go to the gym, this just means to stay healthy.  Be conscious of what you eat and the things you do.  This also includes learning.  Be careful of the stuff you allow in your head.

3.  Expect the best and Prepare for the worst- Always have this mentality.  This will allow you to always enjoy life while always ready for its surprises.  I think we can all agree that life gives us some big surprises.  People have a mindset of “that couldn’t happen to me?” and that is the kiss of death.  I relate this to seeing people swimming with sharks.  It is very uncommon to hear about a shark attack when people VOLUNTARILY swim with them.  Why people would do that…I don’t know, but the sharks do not hurt them.  Why is that?  The reason is because they are prepared, paying attention and taking the right PREcautions.  The $500 Millionaire will discuss this in another blog.

Just make sure you’re taking actions to better set up your future rather than allowing the events in your future dictate your life.  One thing I respect about the $500 Millionaire is he is very rarely caught off guard.  The reason why is not because he is lucky or has it easy (trust me, that is not the cast).  The reason is because he has taking actions to answer the questions “What if?” Some say he sometimes goes above and beyond to prepare himself for the worst case scenario.  Now he doesn’t create bomb shelters for his family but he is taking small, necessary steps to make sure if something bad happens, he is able to handle it.  That is in life and that is in business.  It is a high chance that the longer you live, the more “What If” situations you will encounter.

When people ask the $500 Millionaire why he does the things he does and why he is always a few steps ahead, his answer is simple.  He asks back “Why Not?”  Why are you not ready for this bad economy?  What are you not saving money? Why are you not ready for your company to have a bad quarter?  Why are you not prepared for when your child goes to school, or your child gets sick, or your child is in trouble?    Why are you not prepared?

There are a TON more you can do and probably some that you are doing that others might not know about, please feel free to comment with some things that you do to create a good offence so you don’t have to worry about the defense.  Remember one of the best defenses you can have is a great offense but you always NEED both.


The Truths about the Bible

I want to start off saying this is NOT a rant about the Bible or religion.  This was a non-spiritual, self-reasoned, eye opener I was show this weekend by the $500 Millionaire that I NEVER would have found on my own. No matter if you feel the Bible is the word of God or not, please do not worry, this post is not to prove one or the other and in all honestly does not talk about religion or God at all.

The Truths about the Bible.